it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
