if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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