I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
