Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
