Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
