We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
