I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
