I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
