Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Randomize
