the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize