i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Randomize
