just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
He passed out mid-signature
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
