I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
is that a dick in a sweater?
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
