Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
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