D3 body, D1 cock
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
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