i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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