It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
