from now on my penis is your penis
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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