True but thats because hes a fetus.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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