his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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