I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
