I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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