Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
