Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
