i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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