Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Where are you guys?
Drunk
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
