yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
You smell like a Billy Joel song
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
