Pappa wants mamma naked
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
