i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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