Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
