Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
