I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
