are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
