No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Randomize
