so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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