I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Randomize
