I want to stick my p in your. b.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Randomize
