you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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