How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Randomize
