i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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