Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
