what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Randomize
