My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize