I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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