Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
He did a backflip because drugs
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize
