Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
