she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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