so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize