whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
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