I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
