I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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