question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Who died my cat blue again?
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Randomize
