and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
