Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize